Sunday, 22 May 2016

 

 

White Noise

 

 

Some people need to watch their words. The way they speak. Some people don't care how they speak, what they say and the consequences to how it is going to effect someone.

 

This has been a hard lesson to learn with me and I have become more open to trying new things this year, but at the same time, I have become a closed book.

 

I didn't venture far last year for fear of the adventures that I might go on...

 Were those adventures safe?

Could I possibly achieve something?

What about if...

What if...

What happens when...

 

The voices in my head were filling me with doubt as to how far I could go, how far I wanted to go and should I push my luck...

 

Some people don't like the way I have behaved this year and the decisions I have made.

 They weren't THEIR decisions to make but MINE.

 

In getting far away from my comfort zone, EVERYTHING had to change, but only when I was ready.

 

I hear my own negativity through others this year and it is astounding to listen to...

'Boy, did I really sound like that?'

My attitude SUCKED!!! and it SUCKED BIG TIME!!!

 

Some people would be happy to still be in my comfort zone and to conform to their ideals, some people would be happy to see me live or exist the way I always did, but this year, something snapped AND I decided to change ALL of it.

 

When being told...

You should do this

You should do that...

Yeah I knew all of that, but I had to change EVERYTHING... ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING. I didn't want to at first because it would have been so much easier to stay in that comfort zone and not venture far...

 

In hearing people's negativity these days, their every sound, people that I can't stand anymore because my circle is a lot narrower than it has been previously, I hear a certain sound, their voice, their ideals... It sends shivers down my spine...That is because I resonate with that negativity, because that person used to be me.

 

Some people I just don't want to associate with anymore...

 

I am not a very patient person, never have been and never will be, but the things I have done and am setting out to achieve is nothing short of AMAZING... Some people and their negativity, I am having to walk away from... or run... run, run, run, run, as was the case with my post this morning...

 

Some people I hear: Their voice... it drives me nuts

Some people I hear: Their laugh... it drives me nuts

Some people I hear: Whistling... I am wanting to throw something at them.

Some people yell and talk over me... I am YELLING back and sticking up for myself.

Some people click pens... I am wanting to shove that pen where the sun doesn't shine !!!  IRRITABLE...

 

Life has changed in some ways and not all ways, but my attitude to some people is far less patient than it use to be.

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