To Be Left In The Dark

 

Hold my hand and show me the way. In the darkness I can see glimpses of what my life should look like. I'm not sure where this is all going and what 'this' actually is. 

Uncertainty.

I can hear the wind blowing right now and if I was to go outside it might just bowl me over.

I have nothing to fear, now that I've come this far, I need to hold on and hold on tight.

It's one thing to be a little girl with not a care in the world, but to grow, to be older and still not have a sense of whatever is happening. A sense that something is missing and to be still puzzled as to what the Hell that is.

Sometimes things fall into place and sometimes it is me that is falling over. At the moment I am faking things and walking with confidence, faking it til I make it. I am walking with pride as to how far I've come but still questioning what is happening and where the Hell everything is going.

Uncertainty

Doubt

Fear

Frustration

Anger

Dread

Writing things on here gives me accountability, I own these feelings, they don't own me.

I've come way too far to turn back now.

So... where am I going??? Forward. One step in front of the other.

I'M SET TO SOAR !!!

There will be a few dark alley ways and I won't know where they will lead me.

The answer to that is I'm not meant to know.

I have a lot to achieve and instead of being overwhelmed, I am taking things one step at a time. One day at a time is too much at this stage. One step at at time it is.