Sunday, 5 March 2017

Reflection Time. Damage Control




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I am very much a people pleaser and do things to please and impress people, even to the point of deciding what to have for dinner!!!

People have walked as I mentioned in the last post. It's not like I am being any different to how I have always been, except I have realized I deserve to be happy too.

The first cut is the deepest and I know I have hurt people, but I don't have to pay for that for the rest of my life and I refuse to do so. More of standing up for myself is required.

More often than not, people will give you a second chance. Some people in recent times, haven't given me a second chance, (Like they're perfect!!!). Not sure if swearing is allowed on here and if I get blocked or get sent a letter to say it isn't I humbly apologize. I have wanted to start my own farm. With a fuck you here, and a fuck you there, here are a fuck you, everywhere a fuck you. Getting a second chance isn't up to me. People will accept you for who you are, or they won't. I need to accept myself more and to be less anxious. Sometimes easier said than done. Being me and true to myself, of late, I have forgotten who I am. Purposely, so people will like me. NO MORE.

Losing 'friends' isn't a loss. Losing people who contact you when it is convenient to them. Having friends is the most precious gift of all.

Speaking of gifts, I have a gift from a friend and can now say I have a new obsession with my Ariana Grande perfume.

I am starting to go back to a time where the people who have left my life weren't in it, and the conclusion is, I survived then, I will survive still, the comfort I draw from that, is I was fine without them prior. My time with them is done.

Sometimes holding on does more damage than letting go x  Namaste.

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